could have..

I could have gone along with your plan, but then I would already know the outcome. And it looked boring.

Sorry...

Food for thought

Art is the record of development - or decline - of human understanding

- Edward Wales Root

Cellar Door...

I am.. cutting myself loose from false desires

I cut myself loose today from wishes previously made.

For over a year I had these vivid ribbons tied around my wrist. Each knot was to represent a desired wish made and the custom was that when the ribbon naturally broke the wish would then come true.

After 16 months the ribbons looked tattered but were nowhere near the point of breaking and giving me my wish. But today I woke up and realized that I never actually wanted that wish. It was made more to convince myself of what I had thought I wanted to want.

Perhaps the ribbons never broke because the wish was never truly a genuine desire..

Why do we convince ourselves of such fallacious yearnings? Especially when we are deeply aware of what we are doing. Its almost like living your life during an outer body experience. You see everything happening. You know its all wrong, but your unable to stop yourself from going further..

I cut those ribbons today. With out much thought. Saw the scissors. Picked them up.

Made the cut.

I am... Questioning what is and is not..

When do we drop the fantasy and settle for reality?

Is it worth the sacrifice?

I am... stained

Deceitful lovers stay with you for a lifetime...

Altering your sight.